Thinking About Grandma Sherry

My Grandpa's passing has brought back a lot of emotions and memories of the day that my mom died.  Even though it will be 14 years in less than a month, I can still recall everything from that day.  I have been waiting for all these emotions to hit me and quite frankly I am really surprised that it has taken this long.  I kept thinking that it would during my pregnancy then when he was born then Mother's Day and so on but although I wished she was here, it wasn't until yesterday that the flood of emotions came and I just couldn't stop it.  I always knew that Tommy would probably not know his Great Grandparents, at least not as the active grandparents they were for me and my brothers but it is heartbreaking that he won't know one of his grandmas....especially one that I know would be so over the moon for him! 

Everyone keeps reminding me that I will have memories and pictures to share with Tommy to help him know his Grandma Sherry and while I know that....no matter what I show or tell him, she will still be a stranger.  Growing up I heard stories and saw pictures of family members who had died and although I am familiar with the stories, I never really felt like I knew the people. 

I am extremely fortunate to have another wonderful Grandma in Carol.  She has been so fantastic and incredibly supportive throughout everything.  She got to see Tommy even before I did, for Pete's sake!  Not many other grandparents are that involved!!!  I think in a lot of ways, she helped delay this from finally hitting me because I felt so loved and cared for. 

I know my mom is looking out for us and I will do my best to share her with Tommy.  I just can't help but wish she was here to snuggle him and rock him for hours. 

We went to visit her grave stone yesterday.  It was really cute when Tommy started to "talk" to her stone.  Chats with Grandma.

Me and my mom.  <3